The only thing more annoying than the rumours of Harry Kane leaving Tottenham are the Manchester United fans pretending they don’t want him.
Kane will be made available for £200m by Daniel Levy when the transfer window reopens to ease our stadium debts, according to the Daily Mail.
MORE: Rumoured Harry Kane £200m Exit – The Numbers Don’t Add Up
United have been one of the 26-year-old’s long-standing admirers and the Daily Mail namecheck them as his most likely destination, even though Sky Sports have since added that Kane won’t be sold to a Premier League rival.
The Sky report was actually met with relief by some deluded United fans on Twitter, who claim to be content with their strike force of 1 in 3 Marcus Rashford, loan fodder Odion Ighalo and 18-year-old Mason Greenwood.
Thank heavens for that…said every ManU fan!
— David Blume (@allegro1950) April 13, 2020
Why when we have the best striker in the premier league already? 🤨
— lorne malvo (@broskrrr) April 12, 2020
No thanks got Rashford & Greenwood
— KSN (@Kulz83) April 12, 2020
Ighalo, enough.
— IG adolfebriansyah (@afdolfeb_09) April 13, 2020
Manutd dont need him. Buying Harry is like taken 10 backsteps.
— Beenblessed♥🙌 (@newme_1019) April 12, 2020
These two are my favourite bad takes on Kane to United though…
Of Rashford’s 19 goals this season, six have been penalties (32%)
Of Kane’s 17 goals this season, four have been penalties (24%)
So who is the penalty merchant now?
Why would United spend £200 million on Kane when we’ve already got Bruno AND Rashford who can take penalties. https://t.co/MQLMadmfQG
— Jay Motty (@RFFH) April 12, 2020
Based on his Spurs ratios, Kane could score 120 goals in three and a half years. United haven’t had a striker who could put up numbers like that since Ruud van Nistelrooy. Even Rooney in his peak wasn’t as prolific.
Really don’t see the sense in buying Kane. He’ll be 30 in 3 years and a few months, will cost a massive fee and wage, delay Rashford’s destiny to be MUFC’s lead striker and hamper Greenwood’s development. Ighalo clearly the better option. He loves Man Utd. What a player! https://t.co/SHGWKsjcUC
— BullBull (@DahiiBhalla) April 12, 2020
I’m not trying to convince United to sign Kane, honestly. It’s like when you want people to want your Mrs, but not have her. Know what I mean?
That bit about the Mrs, What?
I hope Levy still has utter disdain for dealing with Utd. What they did with Berbatov was diabolical. I still shudder at Fraser Campbell being mentioned, possibly the most undeserving England player of all time. Ferguson was complicit in that deal, but called Real ‘assassins’ for their moves on Ronaldo. Total hypocrite. I was pleased Bale didn’t go there. Utd are no longer the Kings of Europe and are still on a par with us at the moment, although they are creaking ahead. Spurs should not sell to rivals. Kane would be a good fit for PSG and Barca right now. Throw in Coutinho, Arthur and Semedo (is that too much to ask?) in the deal and we get three top draw players. Never going to happen, but it is my dream, but Coutinho in a deal has legs.