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90 minutes should know better, but then the bigger the operation the bigger the overheads and the bigger the pressure to drag the traffic in, even if it is kicking and screaming.

Denzil Justus Morris Dumfries is mediocrity in a glass. An untouched, full pint that’s been abandoned on a table that nobody even recalls anyone being at. There will be some, not all but some that would look at the drink and see a freshly poured beer with condensation on the outside of the glass.

There’s a plentiful supply of little bubbles spiralling up through it and even a good lawyer couldn’t explain the difference between that glass and another one on the bar, part of a round of drinks. Someone will scoop the left-behind beer, but the odds of that dramatically increase if the beer is in a low-rent setting.

If one is seeking evidence that Tony Conte probably isn’t looking to replace Emerson with Dumfries, the answers are in the numbers. If you factor in the close to 200 additional minutes played, you get a player that passes with less accuracy, but nudges the data on the strength of a solitary goal. A single goal in a different league, at that.

In no discipline does Dumfries excel, his crossing accuracy is 22.9%, and Royal’s is 32.5%. Anyone making a case for Dumfries is a child.

But he was brilliant against the USA in the World Cup!

You’ve won me over, let’s get him in, ASAP. If Conte wants him… blah de blah…

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