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Good afternoon campers.

Bonzo’s mum has been in the news. Despite what some of you are thinking, it wasn’t like that. She wasn’t caught speeding whilst power walking. It was but a gripping tale of a mother worried by her offspring’s recreational balloon inhalation, weapon of choice.

She told him and he told The Times and they told us:

Many footballers have been reprimanded for worse misdemeanours than Walker’s and undoubtedly more will be in the future. That did not spare him a telling-off from his mother, Tracey, though. “My mum said, ‘Kyle what have you been doing. Are you sure you are hanging around with the right people’,” he said.

André’s pre match presser was interesting stuff. Ade has been Tweeting that he’s been going into training, yet the boss says he’s been suffering from ‘dizziness’ and missed training. Perhaps this suggests an imminent bid from a bankrupt Spanish super power.

In Spain no one van hear you ask for a lend of your hair gel.


Tags Bonzo Emmanuel Adebayor Kyle Walker