10 O’Clocker: Miracle required to ever see Tanguy Ndombele in a Spurs shirt again

Miracle: an extraordinary and welcome event that is not explicable by natural or scientific laws and is therefore attributed to a divine agency.

A number of key players were absent from the friendly game against Ipswich Town on Saturday. Harry Kane was unavailable due to unfortunate timing, and so he and his family have been quarantined, in order to stay in line with the government’s Coronavirus policy. Mousa Sissoko has an ongoing hamstring strain, and it is widely believed that Serge Aurier is shortly to be on his way to Italy.

Tanguy Ndombele’s absence I am told by a source close to Tottenham Hotspur Football Club is merely part of the ongoing stand-off between the player and the club. Kindly note the deliberate distinction; as, yet I am unable to get to precisely what has caused this whole unfortunate situation.

Word from with in the coaching team is that the boy’s attitude is said to have been abysmal. At £200,000 a week the 23-year-old is behaving like a spoiled, sullen child. Daniel Levy I am given to understand is trying to shift the player – but discreetly and for as much as humanly possible.

Perhaps Tanguy suffered some monstrous indignity at the club’s hands? If so, we should be told!