Home » Must Read Spoof Spurs Stadium Article [Satire]

Must Read Spoof Spurs Stadium Article [Satire]

By The Boy -

This is superb and had to be shared.

In the immortal words of Homer J Simpson, ‘it’s funny because it’s true’.

Well, sorta.

 

Simon Harris and indeed the all the good people at U OK HUN? want an award generally speaking, it’s a great site.

I would go as far to say that it is even more better than the Daily Mash.

 

Given the insane levels of chaos that have dogged this ridiculous shrine to moneymaking, I’ve frequently said that the situation could not be parodied.

We, it can.

 

Given the recent leak that the works at the New Destination™ are unlikely to be completed until February, the club debt has surpassed that of even Manchester United’s and that the playing personnel have been left to run themselves into the floor, it is difficult to poke fun at CEO who has already been completely stripped of any credibility.

However it’s been done quite handsomely here.

‘Due to wiring issues beyond our control, the club are issuing fans with hot towels at kick off and half time, once again, thank you for your patience and your support’…

 

 

 

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Ronan
Ronan
4 years ago
Reply to  Harry Hotspur

Hehe backed by BMJ wearing a tutu and a nude human train of other luminaries of the tavistock project .. Franco, Juande, Damien, Frankie Arnesen, Jacques, Pleaty…

Harry Hotspur
Harry Hotspur
4 years ago
Reply to  Ronan

Plot twist: AVB crashes presser – he is naked – and singing show tunes… ‘Gonna wash that man right outta my hair🎼’

Ronan
Ronan
4 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

“Eddie my boy you understand that the project never ends,it is and always will be jam tomorrow..”

Eddie at first press conference: “I’m very excited about the project here..”

Harry Hotspur
Harry Hotspur
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

My cat is better than Davies right now. And I neither own a cat or like cats.

Ronan
Ronan
4 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Many congrats, dilly, hope it’s a great day!

Harry Hotspur
Harry Hotspur
4 years ago

Hehehehe

Paddio
Paddio
4 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

Poch is back on the Levy bus, must be promised something

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
4 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Oh its gone alright. I’ll never forget what these parasites have done though.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
5 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

Old Ed is used to a bit of rusky cash…..dunno if he’ll enjoy Levy’s way.

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
4 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Shame luke amos is injured. He was close to getting a game. KWP over davies all day long for me though he had a tough game against the hammers. Got bullied.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
4 years ago
Reply to  Harry Hotspur

Ha!….. Anuvva one after my money

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Ideally I would have liked to have taken the whole day off on Tuesday before my celebratory party but not possible.

dilly
dilly
4 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Yes I remember the swinging 60s and attended a Beatles concert.
It’s been a Hard Days Night. Let it Be!

Legoverlass
Legoverlass
5 years ago

During which Levy will be tapping up Eddie Howe about being the next young unproven won nothing “project manager” when Pooch flys the coup.”Eddie my boy you understand that the project never ends,it is and always will be jam tomorrow, there is no investment in the squad just player sales before buying cheap and young and the objective is to cream the most revenue from the CRN ‘s whilst never actually winning anything. Oh and don’t ever bother me with transfer requests as I will be busy in the Daniel Levy suite building more houses and hotels. One other thing is that you need to persuade the players to wear helmets and shoulder pads like we are flogging in the worlds largest merchandise shop. NFL rules Eddie remember that. Are we understanding each other Eddie, never forget Eddie it’s all about the readies my boy “

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

You gotta let the old place go mate. Its gone. :< we should&#039ve bumped it up to 50.000 seats a decade ago

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
4 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Tape it and watch it after. Expect its a sell out for cup v a league 1 side.

dilly
dilly
4 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Glad you enjoyed it. Missing the match tomorrow due to a social occasion when Poch would be wise to select KWP in the line up at the expense of Ben Davies and drop Eriksen for Skipp. Yes drop Eriksen for Skipp. Too bold? Naturally it wont happen but I have said it! Dropping Alli for Llorente ought to come into the consideration as well but that wont happen either!

dilly
dilly
4 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Born 13.11.58!

Harry Hotspur
Harry Hotspur
4 years ago
Reply to  dilly

I literally did not know he existed until yesterday. And now, he no longer exists…

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
4 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Ooo I didn’t know they was on the tele. 7/1 Haringay win. Worth a sneaky 5er

Paddio
Paddio
4 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

The stadium is a victim of Levys incompetence, if he said two years from the start most of the ill feeling wouldn’t be there

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

No fairytale at Coles Park but what a performance by Haringey.
The non-league club gave this everything.
(BBC Sport)

Harry Hotspur
Harry Hotspur
5 years ago

Marry me 😂

dilly
dilly
4 years ago

In case you missed it Joe Johnson has quit as Transport Minister and called for the public to have a fresh say on Brexit. According to the BBC the MP, who is Boris Johnson’s brother but voted Remain in the referendum, said the deal being negotiated with the EU “will be a terrible mistake”. Arguing Britain was “on the brink of the greatest crisis” since World War Two, he said what was on offer wasn’t “anything like what was promised” If you mean leaving the single market, customs union and having full control over our laws which the Brexiteers voted for (Quoting Cameron, Brexit means Brexit!!) then he is probably right.
Apparently 95% there to signing the EU document (Irish Border being the sticking point) Downing Street have ruled out another Referendum.

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Unlucky the borough. Got £200.000 out of it:-) Motown the musical. I recommend it. The Jackson 5 stole the show for most. For me it was marvin gaye. The system in the shaftesbury theatre is heavy. Was impressed with the low frequencies. Crystal clear mids and tops. £7 wine!

dilly
dilly
5 years ago

Out of circulation for much of next week it’s my big birthday! on Tuesday Nov 13th.
Born on Friday 13th (somebody had to) I share my birthday with fellow Scorpions both Gerard Butler (actor) and Whoopi Goldberrg (actress) respectively. Aged 3 yrs when Spurs last won the league title in 1961 Harold MaCmillan was British PM (who famously quipped “you never had it so good”), Eisenhower was USA President and Kroos Choff! was Russian leader.

dilly
dilly
5 years ago

Cruel on gallant Haringey Borough conceding a goal in the 90th minute to AFC Wimbledon.

Mikespurs
Mikespurs
5 years ago

Other news, first American (raised brooklyn) to be in the chess finals since bobby Fisher. Blundered his opening but saved a draw. Got caught in a mandatory sexual harassment meeting that took the better part of 2 god awful hrs……waiting for a chess piece to move on my phone has never been so enthralling

Lord Croker
Lord Croker
5 years ago

With only half seats sold.

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Passed the new place late last night with some of her LEDs on. She’s looking sexy. An engineering marvel. You can see her from bruce grove. My favorite view is the one from my flats. Great view of her from ally pally at night too. Cant wait for my spurs to come home. It feels strange not having the manor a wash with yids on match days. Ill tell you something else lots and lots of kids are wearing the colours. We’re reeling them in. I’m proud to say I worked on the project. Made a good good few quid! Not going back to work till February.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
5 years ago

Ref has been an absolute disgrace. Given the league side e v e r y t h I n g

Elevenstonedidiots
Elevenstonedidiots
4 years ago

As i said before theres a remake of The Money Pit in there somewhere starring Daniel LEVY as Ton Hanks and Pochettino as Shelly Long

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
5 years ago

We’re still in this. I got 10/1 in coral for Haringay to win. Come on lads.

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Planned to go watch Haringey borough fc later. Misses calls me from work all jolly saying she’s got us two tickets to go see Motown the musical at the shaftesbury theatre. Arrrgh. Id better get ready! Paul Smith whistle 🙂

Only Me.
Only Me.
5 years ago

Luckily in the list of things that will likely go wrong…this is not one of them. I would not put it past Levy though to find out he has applied for a charity HQ that looks like a football stadium to bypass some sort of tax implications.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crac
5 years ago

If only. Rebuild WHL to exact definition.

Opening game in the NWO arena is a 15 minute long film on the big screen of Levy pointing and laughing. Then everyone settles down for the Bournmouth match in what will be dubbed….”The Race for 6th”

Ronan
Ronan
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Many congrats, dilly, hope it’s a great day!

Ronan
Ronan
5 years ago
Reply to  The Boy

Hehe backed by BMJ wearing a tutu and a nude human train of other luminaries of the tavistock project .. Franco, Juande, Damien, Frankie Arnesen, Jacques, Pleaty…

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Shame luke amos is injured. He was close to getting a game. KWP over davies all day long for me though he had a tough game against the hammers. Got bullied.

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Ideally I would have liked to have taken the whole day off on Tuesday before my celebratory party but not possible.

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Yes I remember the swinging 60s and attended a Beatles concert.
It’s been a Hard Days Night. Let it Be!

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

Born 13.11.58!

dilly
dilly
5 years ago

Out of circulation for much of next week it’s my big birthday! on Tuesday Nov 13th.
Born on Friday 13th (somebody had to) I share my birthday with fellow Scorpions both Gerard Butler (actor) and Whoopi Goldberrg (actress) respectively. Aged 3 yrs when Spurs last won the league title in 1961 Harold MaCmillan was British PM (who famously quipped “you never had it so good”), Eisenhower was USA President and Kroos Choff! was Russian leader.

Ronan
Ronan
5 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

“Eddie my boy you understand that the project never ends,it is and always will be jam tomorrow..”

Eddie at first press conference: “I’m very excited about the project here..”

dilly
dilly
5 years ago

In case you missed it Joe Johnson has quit as Transport Minister and called for the public to have a fresh say on Brexit. According to the BBC the MP, who is Boris Johnson’s brother but voted Remain in the referendum, said the deal being negotiated with the EU “will be a terrible mistake”. Arguing Britain was “on the brink of the greatest crisis” since World War Two, he said what was on offer wasn’t “anything like what was promised” If you mean leaving the single market, customs union and having full control over our laws which the Brexiteers voted for (Quoting Cameron, Brexit means Brexit!!) then he is probably right.
Apparently 95% there to signing the EU document (Irish Border being the sticking point) Downing Street have ruled out another Referendum.

Mikespurs
Mikespurs
5 years ago

Other news, first American (raised brooklyn) to be in the chess finals since bobby Fisher. Blundered his opening but saved a draw. Got caught in a mandatory sexual harassment meeting that took the better part of 2 god awful hrs……waiting for a chess piece to move on my phone has never been so enthralling

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Glad you enjoyed it. Missing the match tomorrow due to a social occasion when Poch would be wise to select KWP in the line up at the expense of Ben Davies and drop Eriksen for Skipp. Yes drop Eriksen for Skipp. Too bold? Naturally it wont happen but I have said it! Dropping Alli for Llorente ought to come into the consideration as well but that wont happen either!

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Unlucky the borough. Got £200.000 out of it:-) Motown the musical. I recommend it. The Jackson 5 stole the show for most. For me it was marvin gaye. The system in the shaftesbury theatre is heavy. Was impressed with the low frequencies. Crystal clear mids and tops. £7 wine!

dilly
dilly
5 years ago
Reply to  dilly

No fairytale at Coles Park but what a performance by Haringey.
The non-league club gave this everything.
(BBC Sport)

dilly
dilly
5 years ago

Cruel on gallant Haringey Borough conceding a goal in the 90th minute to AFC Wimbledon.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago

Ref has been an absolute disgrace. Given the league side e v e r y t h I n g

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago

We’re still in this. I got 10/1 in coral for Haringay to win. Come on lads.

Lord Croker
Lord Croker
5 years ago

With only half seats sold.

Elevenstonedidiots
Elevenstonedidiots
5 years ago

As i said before theres a remake of The Money Pit in there somewhere starring Daniel LEVY as Ton Hanks and Pochettino as Shelly Long

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

Old Ed is used to a bit of rusky cash…..dunno if he’ll enjoy Levy’s way.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Oh its gone alright. I’ll never forget what these parasites have done though.

Paddio
Paddio
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

The stadium is a victim of Levys incompetence, if he said two years from the start most of the ill feeling wouldn’t be there

Paddio
Paddio
5 years ago
Reply to  Legoverlass

Poch is back on the Levy bus, must be promised something

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Tape it and watch it after. Expect its a sell out for cup v a league 1 side.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago
Reply to  Tappaspur

Ooo I didn’t know they was on the tele. 7/1 Haringay win. Worth a sneaky 5er

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Planned to go watch Haringey borough fc later. Misses calls me from work all jolly saying she’s got us two tickets to go see Motown the musical at the shaftesbury theatre. Arrrgh. Id better get ready! Paul Smith whistle 🙂

Legoverlass
Legoverlass
5 years ago

During which Levy will be tapping up Eddie Howe about being the next young unproven won nothing “project manager” when Pooch flys the coup.”Eddie my boy you understand that the project never ends,it is and always will be jam tomorrow, there is no investment in the squad just player sales before buying cheap and young and the objective is to cream the most revenue from the CRN ‘s whilst never actually winning anything. Oh and don’t ever bother me with transfer requests as I will be busy in the Daniel Levy suite building more houses and hotels. One other thing is that you need to persuade the players to wear helmets and shoulder pads like we are flogging in the worlds largest merchandise shop. NFL rules Eddie remember that. Are we understanding each other Eddie, never forget Eddie it’s all about the readies my boy “

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

You gotta let the old place go mate. Its gone. :<\ we should've bumped it up to 50.000 seats a decade ago

Tappaspur
Tappaspur
5 years ago

Passed the new place late last night with some of her LEDs on. She’s looking sexy. An engineering marvel. You can see her from bruce grove. My favorite view is the one from my flats. Great view of her from ally pally at night too. Cant wait for my spurs to come home. It feels strange not having the manor a wash with yids on match days. Ill tell you something else lots and lots of kids are wearing the colours. We’re reeling them in. I’m proud to say I worked on the project. Made a good good few quid! Not going back to work till February.

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago
Reply to  The Boy

Ha!….. Anuvva one after my money

Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
Is Gascoigne gonna have a crack?
5 years ago

If only. Rebuild WHL to exact definition.

Opening game in the NWO arena is a 15 minute long film on the big screen of Levy pointing and laughing. Then everyone settles down for the Bournmouth match in what will be dubbed….”The Race for 6th”

Only Me.
Only Me.
5 years ago

Luckily in the list of things that will likely go wrong…this is not one of them. I would not put it past Levy though to find out he has applied for a charity HQ that looks like a football stadium to bypass some sort of tax implications.

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