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Tancredi Palmer is a bald halfwit.

That said, I would urge readers to look beyond this disgracefully cheap and vile assault upon the character of an otherwise decent man. To ignore my personal take on the Palm boy.

I eventually got hold of Gladys this afternoon, who confirmed my suspicion that Barcelona have not remotely been in touch with Tottenham.

There’s more chance of the psychic playing at your local civic centre getting touch with your auntie Mabel than Barca reaching out to Spurs for the services of the Bonzmeister.

Glad said: “I’ve told you what the issue is with Kyle. Maybe it can be solved and he will stay, Tancredi is not in the loop.”

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