Gladys tells me Toby Alderweireld is expected to sign a new deal imminently with the official announcement to follow shortly.
The 28 year old international will pen a bumper new deal as Levy continues his efforts to secure the current squad, as the move into the New Destination™ gets ever closer.
This is no mean feat given the interest that Spurs have encouraged interest by taking so damn long to get this new contract over the line. One solid enquiry from a Premier League rival was already received in recent weeks.
The Sea Lions and less amphibious Flat Earthers will rejoice insanely, but in this instance they’d be right to do so.
Anyone trying to prise Toby from Spurs now would have to pay through the absolute eyeballs to land one of our best players who is 29 in March this year. This situation was primed for Tottenham to take control of and they did it.
Hurrah!
Not trying to ITK bother, but it does worry me that no other Media outlet is reporting anything positive on this at all. I hope its a secret, but not seen one of them at a club for years.
And you’re toast.
Bye!
Jacky Arsewipe off injured does make my heart glad. One of the highlights of my trip to the Lane last year was seeing him crock himself while playing for Bournemouth, to the chants of “It’s happened again, It’s happened again, Jack Wilshere, It’s happened again!”
Brilliant.
He gets hurt so often he could be one of ours
That was poetic justice, wodda good day that was!
Oh dear. Just as the man who gives morons a bad name was going to discuss a new contract, he goes and proves he’s dead meat yet again.
Couldn’t happen to a more dislikeable shit
Was there any doubt…good news Aitch. thank you
In his honour
https://youtu.be/g8f_XCH3zmM
The word I heard was that the great man loved this spoof
A couple of kiwi’s who are quite funny with their own comedy show
Had their own show. They do an excellent live show when they aren’t making movies and stuff
They’ve been on Radio Four doing their stuff as a shite duo of singer/songwriters with a dodgy agent.
that’s the show….the agent is funny too
Rhys Darby. Been in a bit of stuff
Flight of the conchords
I reckon so. Considering Bowie recorded the Laughing Gnome and this gem
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y_t5qgv04jk
Don’t let Nilly hear this one…
Truncheons at the ready!
Saw Jumanji this evening. It was reasonably entertaining and I’d give it 7/10 because I find Karen Gillan easy on the eye and Jack Black had some funny scenes. Dwayne Johnson was also pretty good. The story was incidental.
Splendid, I’ll remember to give it a miss then.
You missed any other films recently Caspurs?
Jack Black is bloody brilliant. School of Rock, Nacho Libre and Goosebumps are quality.
He was the standout in this film. Excellent science where he tries to teach Karen Gillan how to flirt with guys (she being a nerd).
*scene
Yeah he’s really funny 😂😂😂
Great news Tobes is staying, Well done Senor Levy 👌🏻. On that note i have a new terrace melodeeesbfor our main man Son. To the tune of ‘Dont get me wrong’ by the Pretenders.
Oh Heung Min Son
If I’m looking kind of dazzled
I see neon lights
Whenever you run by
Oh Heung Min Son
If I’m acting so distracted
I’m thinking about the fireworks
That go off when you smile
Oh Heung Min Soooooooon
We come and go like fashion
We might be great tomorrow
But hopeless yesterday (tongue in cheek)
Oh Heung Min Son
I like it…do you have any pull on the terraces
Hmmm, thank you Syd. Never pulled on the terraces , now you come to mention it. Not sure if I stand less or more of a chance now we’ve gone upmarket.
just bring some cheeeese
2 years to the day that Bowie left us. Two years? Does not seem that long at all, scary,
Everyday I ponder my mortality and try to pick which song to have played at my funeral.
Depending on if I choose:/
Burial – Going Underground – The Jam
Cremation – Ashes are Burning – Renaissance. Have to be the final 4 minutes as it’s a long ‘un.
If you’re lost at sea – Float on – The Floaters.
I was hoping for – Don’t Go (Please Stay) – The Drifters. Bit more mainstream?
That’s a good one, going underground, love it.
Consideration No 1. If you don’t know me by now
No 2. Another one bites the dust
No 3 . Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me.
Yeah, I did consider Queen.
VAR is currently searching for an honest passage of play, don’t hold your breath.
Just watching the Arse Tott
4-4
Ade with arse Bentley with us
Pleat ‘ I dont know where to start explaining this game’
Great end to the game but we had some pretty ordinary players in that team.
…and a shit manager
He did use everything he knew though
He never said he was a genius
He was a blinking genius
Yes but there were sone beautiful goals
Derbies are not about quality they are about passion
The football was quite good under Arry.
He didn’t Pratt about, did he? Don’t think he’d enjoy passing sideways and backwards just to play keep ball.
Glory days, not!!
VAR will kill football
Just like video killed the radio star..
The Buggles. Excellent.
The first music video played on MTV.
Sky killed football, VAR will kill football again.
This is brilliant by Dr Weevil. We can now sell Toby for 1/10th of the Stadium build this summer as we know these contracts are nothing but negotiating tools.
isnt price fixing illegal
This is football though, mel
Chelsea could do with a Barkley type player to bring on….
Ar5eana1 just took ne off..
If you were suggesting ‘mediocre English midfielder usually injured’ type..
I’m hoping there’s extra times. That’s a lot of songs; cheers lads! Btw, RMG ian is greedy I know but is this Gomes we’re linked with any good?
its over 2 legs
Arsenal parking the bus, Wenger is getting desperate, we need to smash um at Wembley…
Jack Wheelchair off injured. Whodafunkedit
He’s a cunt, obvs, but he’s looked decent the last few games.
Glad to hear he is off, loving it…..he’s a *insult goes here*
He’s a podgey coke head, no wonder he keeps getting injured.
If he could, he would…
Lurve at first sight.
Keown had a monkey’s head, Pochs got monkeys arms…
He needs em for Levy’s pockets!
Keown still has a monkeys head.
Dang it, I was so looking forward to us being linked with Johnny Evans
He turned us down as has a cheese allergy.
Briefever. Nasty.
At least it’ll pass quickly.
You never Toby Alderweireld contemplating
With my heart, my love
You never Toby Alderweireld contemplating
With my heart, my love
Don’t even make sense. I’m shit at this.
Clicked a link to this story from NewsNow and it flashed on your site for a second before redirecting to ebay. If that’s how you are going to run this site, I won’t be visiting again.
No, that never happened.
Spot the error-
https://www.si.com/soccer/2018/01/10/tottenham-frontrunners-race-sign-teenage-fulham-starlet-ryan-sessegnon
Hehe. It’s like a news item version of a knock-off Chinese Sburs shirt you might buy online.
Sesseg Non – somewhere means no sausage
Pellegrino has a fake id.
mauricio pellegrino
Tottenham. Should say Southampton.
Toby Alderweireld
He’ll get a hold on you believe it
He’s like no other
Before you know it you’ll be on your knees
Like it, Phil him up.
a)It took a while for Alderwireld to figure it out,but he is more loyal than 90% of the schmucks here
q)
Toby or not Toby (to stay a Tottenham player)
Hmm, don’t know who to believe Glad, or Kristof Terreur.
All der wei reld
Carry the news
He won’t be selled
Carry the news
Fuck if was Levy I would dump Spurs and set up a team in Manchester
It cant fail!
Al-der-weireld
Like mist rolling in from the sea,
His desire is always to be here
Oh Al-der-weireld
That makes the choon bearable!
You must of come over all Glad when you heard the news H.
Im Happy yo be a big fat flatearther
Im Happy yo be a big fat flatearther
Im Happy yo be a big fat flatearther
Im Happy yo be a big fat flatearther
He’s Toby Alderweireld
Just guess what he will do
He’ll put his Tottnum jersey on
And stomp all over you
Toby Alderweireld
He’s just had his wage swelled
Rose can’t get his name spelled
Toby Alderweireld
Make Toby the Captain
This to that.
What about crisp bag hands??
To-by Al-der-weireld, weireld, weireld, weireld
To-by Al-der-weireld’s in love
Twas never in fucking doubt.
Lets hope he doesn’t Barkley us at the signing pose.
Al-der-weireld, full of fun seems to be the ideal candidate
Hmm, Al-der-weireld lets you hide all the sadness you feel
Yes, he really fell in love with the Spurs and the chance
So please don’t worry yourself, it’s not a fake Spurmance
Al-der-weireld…
Delete ‘candidate’
I see a little signature of Alderweireld
Scaramouche, Scaramouche
He plays with Jan Ver-tonghen
Centrebacks of lightning
Very, very frightening
Toby and Jan, The Belgian Plan. Very, very frightening.
You start it, I’ll join in…
Mamma mia mamma mia let me go
Are Spurs the real life
are we a fantasy
Open you eyes and see…
But dont ask for sympathy
Cos we are easy come easy go
We go high,we go low
Doesnt really matteranyway the wind blows doesnt rally matter to me
Great news if true. Sends a sign to others that it’s ok to stay/ come to us. Nice to sign him for football reasons; he’ll have very little sell on value when it ends, assuming it’s a decent length contract
That. Is. Cracking!
Absolutely brilliant.
I hope this is true otherwise the half tea spoon of ejuculate ive just produced will have to go down as a waste.
What were you gonna do with it otherwise? On second thoughts, don’t answer that!
If there were swimmers in it it was worthless anyway.
*weren’t
Man city can’t sign Sanchez too surely. Its getting fucking silly. Yet its City’s name I hear and only City. All set up then Pep? Sure there’s nuffin else?…..no……?….Ronaldo perhaps? Messi?…..your good?…..okay.😴😴😴
So is this a 50/50? Poch signed him first, then Levy gets him to resign??
Don’t remember that being said?! Then again I forget my name half the time!
If this is a protective contract then his wages won’t reflect the his value. If Toby gets a hefty pay rise this should suggest he is staying.
He is nearly 30 so resale value wouldn’t be massive (£40-50m) although clearly in the top defenders bracket.
The only concern is his comments regarding his family and the sacrifices he has made.
Great news!
Nearly 30, as in 28?
80 is the new 50 according to the Guardian
https://www.theguardian.com/science/2017/may/30/old-people-death-70s-80s-active-adults
Geweldig nieuws.
Thank fuck for that
So, you’ve stolen the surprise from the club?
H is the avant garde of the THFC PR dept.
I am going to the Everton match and I need to find something that rhymes with Alderweireld to sing please.
I failed with purple and orange so I’d look elsewhere!
Nope, that’s close enough I feel if I shout loud enough.
Good luck 🤣
I’m thinking of a Lisa Stansfield classic …
Been around the world and I I I ??
Bosh!
Could that be classified as a classic tho?
Only for her
Alderweireld rymes with New of the World.
Tead all about it.
Not exaggerating; I think we will now win the EPL and Champions League double.
I like your thinking, it makes me seem smart.
😋🤣
Watch us rise!
Spurs U18s 4 Pooh U18s 0.
Well that is dreadful news, Levy will want them in the first team squad pronto ☹️
Oliver Skipp is getting a lot of attention. He is the new Marcus Edwards.
Judging by previous results Lpools under `18 side must be really bad
I’d have a go on Gladys after hearing that !
Best defender in the world, in my opinion.
This is very good news.
Well done Daniel Levy.
No signing will beat that this month..and that is certainly not an understatement when we sign no one else !
This isn’t football London in disguise is it?
😂
They rehashed that article 3 times for good measure
Wunderbar 🙌
Any ITK on what we had to offer him H….?
Levy will pay him during the half time break instead of docking the 15 mins from his salary.
….plus all the Stilton and crackers he can eat.
Mighty news – the best centre back in the premiership – now lets get mahrez or saha and kick on for top 4 so we can have champions league football back at the lane
Saha wasn’t great the last time we had him
Plus, he must be 89 by now.
Ok Ruel Fox might be a better option then 😂
Only for scrabble.
Agree. We should re sign Chris Gunter instead.
Don’t get carried away now buddy 😏
It’s bl@@dy great news. There is no downside.
Toby’s head looks like its been photoshopped in! Like a–um–new signing…
Well, he is the big cheese now.
EXCLUSIVE!
Tobias must be the guy wearing the expensive watch. It’s been so long since we’ve seen him………
Why is there a pair of scissors in the photo
Ask Cas.
Fake!! Toby never has a hair out of place.
He’ll get it sorted now he can afford to.
Nope not avvin it.
I’ve been looking at him for the last 10minutes and he hasn’t flinched once.
You haven’t refreshed the page have you?
Tut, tut!
It’s like an ISIS propaganda shot !
Eh, he’s signed for Oxford University’s 2nd boat crew?
H has duped us good and pwopa.
they dont look very close to me
Interesting skin tones.
Ummm…My thoughts as well….Rather dark looking hands….Good Photo shop of Danny Rose signing perhaps??
https://goo.gl/images/rNhfR6
Congratulations, you win no prize!
Original image:
Nutty you should have posted a black and white photo. 🙂
I used Danny deliberately for effect. 😛
Everyone’s favourite.
You should have used the photoshop of his centre back partner instead 🙂
I tried that but my hairbrush tool wasn’t working.
Wtf!!
His hands have been on holiday.
He’s got black hands 🤦🏾♂️
The ‘only’ downside?
We haven’t got started yet. Give us a chance.
What’s not like? Good news generally comes in bunches. My undies are bunched over this.
5s come in bunches.
Great ITK. Great news. And great to hear that what Poch and AltheWeirdo would happen, happened.
*said would
If true this is the Best news of the year. He’s been our best player for a long time.
Now that is great news, cheers Harold. We have so missed him at the back
Best news this season so far. Now make him Captain. I suspect Levys little pooped was squeaking at the prospect off. Lynching mob heading his way if he had let Toby go. This will of course be spun as “like a new signing” and maybe an excuse not to sign any actual “ new signings” but it does raise the question as to the wage cap sitz now and whether what has been said made Toby believe he could win stuff with us at the New Destination. Perhaps he has been promised his own brand of cheese there next season.
When are we to expect the official announcement in order that we may indulge in merriment????…… we also need the standard Poch with arm round shoulder photo- perhaps that’s what’s holding it up…….
Poch has to collect it from the dry cleaners tonight.
That is blooming great news. Levy has plugged the hole in the fence left by Walker escaping. If Toby had left I think the whole squad might have crumbled to dust.
Marvellous.
I am even calmer that I was before.
Zen like.
I’m guessing that’s the calm after yesterdays typically annoying storm…
Raging calm.
Thank fuck for some good news.
“Er Er Er” claps attentively and then bounces beachball off nose, “Er Er Er”!
Not arf?
Its only arf done mate, Kane is the other arf, need him to sign!!
He’s already on a contract, does he think we are made of money….the hide……
Better still, we are going to beat Man U, Liverpool and Arsenal, in that order, in February…..See how the bin dippers go without Salah or Courtinho this weekend.
Well happy with that !! Does anyone know the latest on his fitness,hoping he is back for the end of the month as we have a tough run.
Last estimate I saw was still early Feb
Lovely stuff, now we just need a creative pacey player who takes players on so we can stop passing the ball back to the back four for 85 minutes a game.
And a decent right back…….
Does this means Spurs must be paying the going rate?
It could mean anything 1) we are paying going rate from now on, 2) we are just upping his resale value, 3) we are about to buy someone and don’t want Toby to see the pay of the new kid first, 4) Levy was going to up it all in new stadium anyway, but doing it to keep people happy….or could just mean toby deserves this and Levy is bricking him leaving because our defence has gone from a title defence to a relegation defence in his absence.
Number 2
Probably right…..
Excellent news, along with Verts, Wanyama and Kane, he is key for us and any progression we hope to make.
If only we could get a proper baller in the middle of the park; an actual winger of quality; and some decent back-up/competition for Kane, we would be in danger of actually winning something.
I am rejoicing insanely! Would have been criminal to let him go
This doesn’t stop that possibility from happening, as mentioned below, see Bale.
Investment protection, first and foremost. That’s what new contracts/extensions are about.
Best news for a while after much doubts on his/our future better news would be hes fit and ready to play — any expectations on when that might be ???
As you say, someone will have to pay through the nose now. Therein lies the reason. Bale signed a big contract. It don’t mean shit and I just insures Levy can rinse whoever he eventually flogs him too. Unless top 4 is secured and we can show Poch and his brave new world is not on the wane. Kane and Alderwireld are part of a spine that must be kept going into the new stadium.
Toby signed a new contract because someone will have to pay through the nose now? What a terribly thoughtful chap he is.
good news now get ryan from fulham
And in other news today AVB has crashed his Dakar car.
Bullshit goes a long way but you are soon found out in boxing or rallying
The religion of peace means that the race no longer goes to Dakar…..branding is a funny thing….but not as funny as religion
Me likey very much
audreyweird,hes off then and we are gonna make a barrel of money
That’s brilliant news!
Cracking News! Even better than Gomes coming to us, now that Couthino has signed for Barca.
New contract = larger resale value…..we ain’t out of the woods until we hear what the wages are
So are you suggesting Toby signed a new deal, but wasn’t happy with the wages?
No, I mean, if it is enough to keep others out of his mind who can offer more. You don’t jump from a happy ship unless they are paying you a lot more, or so the theory goes
Riiiight.
Stop asking me questions when I am stoned
What about jumping ship to win cups? Hearing alot about that these days, are you saying that players only leave for the money…..I am shocked…..
Our Danny clearly splashed out and took Tobes for a Chick King dinner.
Champions league places …..here we come again
Lovely stuff, H. Best player we have on the books, bar Harry.
(He said, negatively) 😜
Correct. He’s magic.
How the fuck did you get that exclusive H, it’s the greatest bit of news all winter.
Bloody wonderful.
Wonderful news, Aitch: delighted you shared this with us.
Chicken little was wrong!
Lovely, need a proper winger, somebody who will take on an opponent. Zaha?
Poch doesn’t use wingers – but I agree whole heartedly
I am wondering what Poch uses now. Its as though he feels his game plan is good enough, its up to teams to let us through. Much like Wenger does.
Fab news!
🙂 lets see Kane nailed down, and a couple of new signings and Spurs could win the transfer window. Isnt that how sky sports phrase it? Joking aside, this is epic news!
The only downside is that they may use this as an excuse for not signing anyone during this window.
Retaining quality is more important than trying to find more.
Nice.
Would be like a new (contract) signing.