Theoretically We Could Go 3rd

Good morning.

Here are the pick of the Premier League predictions for game week 26. A week where theoretically we could go 3rd. I do hope this crisis under that Chelsea reject, Mr Bean Powerpoint twit keeps going.

Steffen Freund walks into his dressing room. A sultry saxophone is playing in the distance. There’s more than hint of 9½ Weeks about the vibe as a delicate breeze teases at his net curtains. The lighting is best described as, early morning smoky. He slides open a magnificent all white wardrobe door almost Japanese in style; to reveal an inch perfectly spaced hanging rail of tapered 1980′s tracksuit bottoms. He takes the pair to what his farthest right.

Just under his breath he says, ‘Es tut mir leid für den anderen.’ Tottingham 2 Newcastle 1

‘Waiter, more bread, table 4. And hurry!’ The racist chavs will be out in force today. Not so much to voice their support for their team, rather to show their contempt for Rafa. A lunch mob zeal with an Embassy Superkings motif. Chelsea won’t win the league. Which is good for football. What isn’t good for football though is a fan base that hasn’t the balls to confront the owner.

My view is in a generation or twos time it will be decided that Roman’s money breathed life into that club, then suffocated it. Chelsea 4 Wigan 1

Carrow Road will be rocking today. Yokels of all shapes and sizes giving praise to the goddess Delia and canaries of gold. Clipboard Chris has we are opted for the Etch A Sketch, for today’s game. It comes in a purposeful black to denote it’s primary role as a business tool and Staples in Saxmundham released a press statement this morning to the effect that they had ordered faux leather slip cases from the manufacturer, but had been let down on a shopping time-line.

Martin Jol spent last night working off pre-match nerves by doing 6000 press-ups in the breakfast room of his B&B which was specifically sealed off from other guests from 1930hrs last night by the owners of ‘The Maltings’ in nearby Sprowston. Norwich 2 Fulham 2

Arry Redschnapps will be in Wales today managing QPRball who are a football club. The only problem is, they are rubbish at playing football. Swansea have all they need to absorb the school playground boot it and charge after it tactics and if they can be resolute and keep the ball on the floor, this could be a high scoring affair. Swansea 4 QPR 0

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